Hmm 2023! Where do I begin, such a beautiful year you have been for me, I learnt so much about myself, I nailed down my purpose and vision. I travelled with purpose and met the most amazing people which I now call my tribe. I remember having a chat with my new acquaintance, Kennia and told her nowhere really feels like home and not committed to any geographical location nor do I have friendships powerful enough to influence my decisions of staying in a particular region. Then, she asked, if I had thought about the fact that I have relationships around the world that help me seamlessly connect people. She said "that right there is your tribe". Until then, I had never thought of that, I'm grateful she helped me reach that conclusion. In 2023, I did a lot less and got more.
Career
This year, I wanted to grow into my new role and challenge myself a bit more with respect to putting myself forward for additional responsibilities. However, given the economic situation, inflation, tech layoff, I didn't have a lot of leeway so I decided to channel my time into volunteering for the causes I'm passionate about, it was something I wanted to explore, given how busy I get sometimes, I rarely have the time research into topics I would like to raise awareness on, also my tone is pretty direct with a risk of being misconstrued which makes me reluctant about putting myself in these spaces.
In February, I represented my race in the Black History Month, I have to admit that this wasn't planned, however, there were some events planned for the month but when I attended a few of them, I found out they were nonsensical, and none of these events articulated the problems facing the Black community, so I took it upon myself to organise a touchpoint to discuss. After all, it's Black History Month. I'm embarrassed to say this but I hardly volunteer, so people getting an email from me felt unusual and by default, they attended. A night before my presentation, I started questioning my life choices and asked myself "what have I done" I needed to have this presentation with the right tone, approach and overall it had to be perfect and drive the point home. I started doing some research which angered me, immediately, I knew it wasn't the mood I needed to be in so I opted to use the movie "you people" on Netflix as my reference point, it was a funny movie which I believed majority of my audience would have seen.
It was an hour long of speaking, by the time I was done, people had questions, they were empathetic and I'm sure reevaluated their stance on treating the marginalised race. It's one of the fulfilling thing I did this year, in fact I haven't finished responding to all the emails from the attendees. I'm an introvert, I don't like attention and this was what this speech did. I tried to be as graceful as I could but what this did was open more doors for additional volunteering work, luckily I could choose so I stayed within the marginalised group volunteer work.
Secondly, I have been offering my time to people, I have a couple of people I am interested in their progress and continiously advocate for when the need arises and would never mention to to them. I hate labels and wouldn't want anyone to see me as a mentor, asides that, I think the word is bastardised, if anything, I think people need sponsors. I have been lucky to have a lot of sponsors/advocates in my life whom I will never be able to do anything for. For some reason, they can never watch me fail, this, I am extremely grateful for and I would like to be that for others where I can.
In 2024, I would like to have a clear written and measurable goal on this so I can hold myself accountable.
Personal Development
This year, I was intentional on being aware of the people around me. No matter how nasty anyone is, I wanted to be kind, patient and generous with my time. I wanted to be more gracious to people, I wanted to see things from peoples perspective, have empathy without any effect on my boundaries. I think I did that and I will continue to learn, I realise that nothing matters, life is fickle and I want anyone I have an encounter to have an experience. Knowing me should be an experience!
Going to Japan beginning of the year gave me a great headstart, I came back content and wanted to be a better individual. The one thing I still struggle with is patience, I'm very conscious and cognisant of it, I'm very quick to make decisions, I can only attribute that to my gift of seeing through people but sometimes, I would like to extend grace to some situations and people, so I'm still very much developing in this area.
My French lessons and classes are still very steady and consistent, in fact I planned an excursion to Montreal where I only spoke french during my time there, the first day was challenging but I'm glad that I didn't let that deter me. I had people correct my grammar and made me comfortable to speak. In fact, I met someone at the french bar who was struggling to order their meal and I helped translate. Listen, Je fiere de moi!
I didn't read a lot this year because I was travelling a lot but here are the books I read with great intent:-
- Thinking fast and slow
- Exponential organisations
- Never eat alone.
I did do some research in my field that took some ample time as well.
In 2024, I would like the idea of creating art with my hands, my hands never do anything creative, I already know I'm terrible at drawing but I could try pottery or something else. I don't know what it is but my brain is a masterpiece and I would like to see what they can both create collaboratively.
Health & Wellbeing
This area of my life has been a walk in the park, Alihamdullai! I have alway been a clean eater and I prioritise my exercise, both my physical body and mind. I swum everyday during the summer, and still do 30 minutes at the gym every morning without fail except for when I'm travelling. In terms of my mind, I listened to podcasts, my favourite right now is Jay Shetty, and I also started listening to Joshua Selman, his preachings has made me rethink my existence and identified areas that need improvements in my life. I always feel I have an assignment to work on after listening to any of his episodes, even though it's a christian podcast, his teaching are applicable to different aspect of life, I love the versatility.
Family
This year was actually a family year for me, I showed up for all my siblings as well as my parents. I saw the ugly and good side of my sister and brother, I witnessed my dad be in-tune with his emotions in a positive way, which I was glad my brother witnessed so he knows it's okay for him not be strong at all times. I loved that for him!
I'm used to making other people decisions for them unknowingly, I blame it on my impeccable problem solving skills. For the first time, one of my sisters rebelled against my idea which I'm glad she did. She literally said "I hear you but this time I would like to do it my way", even though I knew my way was the right way, I let her and when it didn't turn out as she hoped, I told her I'm happy she did it her way and trusted her gut. Hopefully, It works out next time. I'm naturally a problem solver and I'm working on delegating more to people, I aspire to just be there for moral support or just as a counsel, not imposing my ideas on people. We both learned from that experience.
My brother has been in his teenage phase for a while and it takes every ounce of patience in me to tolerate him sometimes, whenever I visit it's 90% of me admonishing him which doesn't end well for both of us, I don't get to see him at his best and he literally can't stand me either, so I devised a plan not to be oblivious to his misconducts, it's unbelievable how much we have grown closer and the trust we have been able to build following my plan. Our conversations are better and he's actually more receptive towards constructive criticism, it's the best I have seen him and I love that for us. Also, he finished high school this year and surprised us with the good grades, he also got a recognition for being extremely kind, that brought my dad to tears. I have never seen my father so mushy, it is one of his values.
I think 2024, my mom and I are going to have a lot of moments together, I have missed her so much, I'm looking forward to our tea drinking contest, banter etc.
Travel
This year I travelled so much, a lot of these travels didn't make it here, I travelled with purpose, experienced a plethora of cultures and food. I worked out a plan that allowed me spend extended days on holidays. Purposeful travelling is definitely a game changer.
In 2024, my goal is to have a passion project which I can work on simultaneously while travelling, I'm already a compartmentaliser, which means I don't do much work on holidays but I would like to maximise that time on another hobby. I already thought about taking a three month sabbatical to travel and work on my passion projects but the chances of that happening is slim, for now I will make do with my weekly and monthly breaks while I devise a plan of making the 3 month sabbatical a reality. I will be doing a lot of purposeful travels in 2024 which I'm looking forward to as well.
Social life
Non existent ifI'm being honest, I think travelling has eaten up this bit, given how much I travel, whenever I have some downtime, all I really wasn't to do is cuddle up with a great book, drink fine tea, burn some incense and sleep, this area has been converted to self-care. I realise that most of my socials are planned around my own itineraries. For example, I could ask a friend if they wanted to get their nails done as a way of using that time to catch up. I tend to enjoy dinners better alone (dressed like I'm on my way to some Gala) and have people ponder on why I'm alone. It's weird but I somehow prefer that experience.
With respect to dates, I'm just not interested, and don't have the time for it, the thoughts of getting dressed for someone else's viewing pleasure nauseate me. After all, when it's time, all the right partner would require from me is just to exist. Having said that, I do date on my travels, oh a lot of those, I can say I have had a global circle of dating experience through that, mostly spontaneous and beautiful. That probably explains why I can't be bothered when I'm back at my residence.
In a nutshell, God showed up for me this year, not in the way I planned but better which made everything more beautiful. That saying about God's timing is accurate. I'm looking forward to living a more purposeful life in 2024.
Currently spending the holidays alone at my residence indulging my five senses, watching Anime and reading books. I'm currently reading "Lean In" by Sheryl Sandeberg and "Algorithms of Oppression" by Safiya Umoja Noble. Both are phenomenal reads! The coming year is for big decisions so I need all the downtime to get my brain to function optimally, also, I will be working on my goals for the coming year and planning my travels.
Until next time, I wish you all an amazing 2024!
